I've finally given up on sleep for tonight... because my heart hasn't stopped racing yet... and for the cries that break the silence every 45 minutes as my not-even-three-year-old exits a sleep cycle and remembers again, the fall, the fear, the pain, the immobilization...
Deep, deep breath momma.
He's not even three.
He will eventually forget... even if I never do.
But maybe, if I write it down. Right now. I'll think back and instead of the gory details I will remember that which is truly and always most important...
Grace.
The kind of grace that says this is nobody else's fault and there is no room for guilt here... not even a little bit.
Grace that allows a spouse to handle the stress and fear of it all however they need to. It doesn't have to mirror mine, it doesn't have to make sense. It just has to happen... hopefully without the next world war breaking out in ER room A7.
Grace from the paramedics, nurses and team of doctors that put my son back together again. Truly, they were so gracious with us.
Grace from the friends and family who showed up in some way. We love you.
Grace that reminds me it could have been worse... thank you God that it wasn't worse.
Grace that heard the gut-wrenching cries every 45 minutes and got up to soothe him back to sleep.
Grace to bury my head under the pillow to drown out those cries after I realized I wasn't helping.
Grace all around.
And thank God...
There's enough.
Thank you for your prayers... seriously. Thank you so much. Telis is in a cast for the next 4-6 weeks and we won't be able to leave the house at all. It's going to be rough, but... there's grace for that too. He would love some visitors. He also loves Thomas... and Veggie Tales ;)
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